Don’t Go It Alone
We need connections with others to thrive emotionally, socially, and physically in today's complex world.
A friend I hadn't seen in many years reached out to me recently. The last time I saw George was in 1994, just before I left for boot camp with the U.S. Army. At that time, we were both working together at a restaurant. George and I were close; we shared moments of stress and struggle amid the hectic life of the kitchen. Looking back, I realize that those times spent sharing laughter and frustrations were more than just two guys working together. They were valuable moments of trust and transparency between two individuals with a willingness to be vulnerable.
George is one of those friends with whom you can go many years without seeing, yet when you reconnect, it feels like no time has passed. So, when he asked me to talk about mental health issues on his radio show, I knew it would be a wonderful opportunity. We quickly reignited our old bond while discussing serious topics that often affect our mental well-being at various points in our lives.
“A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself...”
This reconnection reminded me how we can sometimes think we don’t need anyone else and that we can do everything independently. We think we are better off not relying on others or that asking for help might be a burden. These thoughts may sometimes come from a deep belief that we are not good enough or unworthy of connection.
But denying ourselves the need for connection fosters loneliness, which is different than being alone. Alone is solitude, while loneliness is the absence of intimacy. Intimacy, in its many forms, is a basic human need. Without it, we deny ourselves the human necessity to be understood, accepted, and loved.
It is important to have safe and vulnerable connections with others. These connections validate our worthiness and gifts. They don’t have to be perfect or long-term.
Reconnect with an old friend. Tell the person serving you they have nice shoes. Converse with your neighbor for twenty minutes. Share your fears with your significant other. Connect, be understood, and live free.
George and I. Reunited after 32 years.
Recording on WKRM 103.7 from Columbia, Tennessee.